What will happen to me if my parents split up?
If
your parents split up, they will want to sort out with you
where you will live. They will also make arrangements for visiting
and keeping in touch with them both. If they can agree and you are
happy with what they are suggesting, then the whole process can be
quite simple.
However, they might not agree about
arrangements for you. If that happens, there are people called
mediators who help families sort out these things. If that does not
work, then a judge in family court may be asked to make important
decisions about where you should live or who you should
see.
What are family courts?
Family courts are there to make
important decisions when families can’t agree by themselves the
arrangements for their children. Family courts are very different
from criminal courts. Remember, you have done nothing wrong –
what’s happening is not your fault.
What does Cafcass do?
Cafcass’ job is to look after children
and young people’s interests in family courts. Cafcass officers
make sure your voice is heard in court. This helps the court make
decisions that are best for you.
Who will come to see me?
A Children and Family Reporter from
Cafcass may be asked to help the court decide what is best for you.
They may come and see you at home, and may also ask you to visit a
Cafcass office, where you can talk in private
What will the Children and Family Reporter
do?
The Children and Family Reporter will
talk to you and ask you what you think about what’s happening. They
will also talk to other people who care about you like your
parents, teachers and relatives. They will try to help your parents
listen to what you have to say and see if they can sort things out
without too much arguing. After the Children and Family Reporter
has spoken to everyone, they will write a report for the court
saying what they think is best for you.
What will the Children and
Family Reporter ask me?
The Children and Family Reporter will
talk about what you want, but will not ask you to decide what
happens next or choose between your parents.
Is what I tell the Children
and Family Reporter private?
What you say to the Children and
Family Reporter may be used in the report they write for the court.
All the information remains private to the court and the parties to
the case (for example your parents and solicitors). The Children
and Family Reporter cannot give information to anyone else without
the court’s permission. If, however, the Children and Family
Reporter thinks you could be harmed, they must tell the court and
could contact Social Services so that they can help you. If you’re
worried about any of this, you should speak to the Children and
Family Reporter when you see them.
Do I have to go to court?
No. Children and young people are not
usually asked to go to court because it is the job of the Children
and Family Reporter from Cafcass to make sure that your views are
passed on to the judge. But if you do want to go to court yourself,
or write a letter to the judge, tell the Children and Family
Reporter.
Can I go to court if I want?
Children and young people have no
right to attend a court hearing unless the judge says they can.
Judges don’t often agree to this as they are worried about the
effect it may have on young people and their families. Sometimes
the judge may decide that a young person should attend court. This
isn’t common either but it may happen in particularly difficult
cases or when young people have very strong views and understand
what is happening well enough to be able to give instructions to
their own solicitor. If this is a possibility in your case then the
Children and Family Reporter should discuss it with you.
What will happen in
court?
The Children and Family Reporter will
write a report for the court. In the report, the Children and
Family Reporter will tell the Judge what you want and what they
think is best for you. The judge will listen carefully to everyone,
especially your mum and dad, and then try to decide what is best
for you. This will help sort out where you should live and how you
keep in contact with both your mum and dad.
Will the court do what I want?
Not necessarily. The court has to do
what it thinks is best for you, which may not be the same as what
you want. However, the court will give very careful thought to your
wishes and feelings.
What will the judge do?
If your parents have managed to reach
an agreement, the judge can decide that no further action is
necessary, and he or she may not do anything more. However, if your
parents still can’t agree, the judge can make a Residence Order
and/or a Contact Order.
What is a Residence Order?
This says who you should live with.
Residence can be shared between parents.
What is a Contact Order?
This deals with arrangements for you
visiting, phoning and having contact with the parent you don’t live
with, as well as other relatives, such as your grandparents.
What other orders can the court
make?
As well as the main orders about
contact and residence the court can make other orders. In many
cases it can do so whether or not someone has asked for them. Read
more about these other orders by visiting ‘The Law about Children’
section of this site. It is also important to know that the court
may decide not to make an order at all. It is not allowed to do so
unless it considers that making an order would be better for the
child than making no order.
Will my brothers and sisters be split
up?
This should not happen unless there
is some really special reason. Children and Family Reporters and
the courts know that most brothers and sisters want to stay
together – even if they argue sometimes!
What happens after the
court case is over?
Your parents will usually tell you
what the judge has decided, although sometimes the Children and
Family Reporter might tell you. They will explain how the judge’s
decision will affect you. The Children and Family Reporter’s job is
then over.